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Dictionary Definitions:
Love [n.]:
A feeling of strong attachment induced by that
which delights or commands admiration; preeminent
kindness or devotion to another; affection; tenderness;
as, the love of brothers and sisters.
Love [n.]:
Affection; kind feeling; friendship; strong liking
or desire; fondness; good will; -- opposed to hate; often
with of and an object.
Love [n.]:
Courtship; -- chiefly in the phrase to make love, i. e., to court,
to woo, to solicit union in marriage.
Love [n.]: Cupid, the god of love; sometimes, Venus.
Love [v. i.]:
To have the feeling of love; to be in love.
Lovely [superl.]: Lovable; amiable; having qualities of
any kind which excite, or are fitted to excite, love or friendship.
The above mentioned definitions give an idea what love means to a lot of mistaken individuals.
The mistake of thinking or understanding the true meaning of LOVE wrongly abridge's the original plan and purpose of Love.
Many relationships today suffer this terrible error, most individuals in false Love Relationship are suffocating and looking for a way out of what seemed to be a perfect "Romantic Fairytale."
Love for a blissful marriage is not;
π “Eros” or Erotic Love
Which is named after the Greek god of love and fertility. Eros represents the idea of sexual passion and desire.
Some relationships are overwhelmed with the euphoria of this kind of Love, the love that has its pleasurable experience and gains as it's set goal.
Eros is an idealistic type of love that is seemed to be felt in the hearts, and can be used to “recall knowledge of beauty” through intimacy and sex. When Eros is misguided then it lead to misuse, abuse and indulged in, which would lead to impulsive acts and heart break.
Check yourself if that relationship is making you act impulsively and you have heart breaks, be sure you're in this type of Love.
π “Ludus” or Playful Love
Ludus has a bit of the erotic eros in it, it is much more than that. The Greeks thought of ludus as a playful form of love, a form of game, the affection between young lovers. Where a form of principle that guards them has to do with "experimenting and conquering presumed boundaries.
Love that would grant you access to "Blissful Marriage" has nothing to do with this type of Love.
π “Mania” or Obsessive Love
Mania love is a type of love that leads a partner into a type of madness and obsessiveness. It occurs when love is misconstrued and there is an imbalance between eros and ludus.
The above kinds of Love mentioned are the bedrock and foundation for today's marriages. Most people mistake Love for the pleasurable attachment that tickles your fancy.
Love is not in those "Romantic Text Messages that wows you and you feel blown off, love is not in those fancy gifts and Thoughtful Surprises that melts your heart and kindles a certain fire of lust and infatuation within you, love is really not in those extra hours and moments of visits that assumes care and warmth..." love is none of these.
All of these kind of love only centers on "ATTRACTION", this is what triggered the desire in the first place. To some it's the 'beauty and handsome nature of the opposite sex, to some it's the curves and physic that captures his/her attention, to some it his/her sense of humor, intelligence, level of education, societal status, strength and control, financial status..." So on and so forth...
All of these only qualify for "LIKENESS" and not Love.
If you have all of these hooked up within you and you expect a blissful marriage, then you only deceive yourself. Your so called love is momentarily centered on the physical. When those things that are it's form or cause of attraction fades away then the exactness of the heart begins to show forth and the veil of 'your so called love' begins fall off and the same eyes that saw 'a Prince Charming / Fairytale Princess' begins to see all sorts of personalities that aren't pleasant.
THE TRUE TYPE OF LOVE
Love is not "Sentimental nor feed by unnecessary Emotions", it is not based on Conditions, it is boundless and sees no Flaws...
True love is gradual but steady in growth, it does not build it's base on just the physical but it anchors it's hope on the infinite complexity of life.
True love is God's original architecture for man's Love for his beloveth, the real blueprint that forsakes hurt and offence, but strives to forgive and continue to Love and cherish his/her relationship despite the multitude of wrongs.
True Love is Sacrificial, it never demands soo much in return.
Sincerely true love comes with pain, but a beautiful kind of pain, this kind of love is never regrettable.
A typical example of this kind of LOVE is God Almighty, He so loved us that he sees us as His bride and despite all we do against His will and purpose He forgives us and seeks for ways to draw us closer to have a better and beautiful relationship with Him. In the sight of trying to show His unrelenting love for us, He sent part of Himself to us as an atonement for our sins, the ultimate sacrifice that brings us to the standard of His righteousness and gives us covering to attain His point of Holiness. (John 3:16)
Sending Jesus as His only begotten son was to establish the fact that He would give Himself for our sakes... Jesus was not just the son of God, but He was a part of God made manifest in human form.
John 1: 1-2
"1 In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God.
2 The same was in the beginning with God."
True love made manifest for us to learn from. True love bears a whole lot of pain and sacrifices to establish it's true intentions.
So, when I say do not marry who you love, I simply mean don't marry based on the contradiction of the canal and literal meaning of love.
π Love is not based on just his charming looks nor hear radiant beauty, it's not centered on her accent or his either, not based on his physique or her curves... No!
WHO SHOULD I MARRY?
Before you tie the knot, make sure you at least look out for these major attributes in your soon to be spouse:
π You must be comfortable around him / her
π He/she must not abuse your person and presence
π He/she must not be hot tempered in nature, at least not to the point of unnecessary violence and rage
π He/she must respect you for who you are, and not otherwise
π He/she must love WORK, do not hope to marry a lazy man or a lazy and lousy woman. He or she must appreciate work and earning money for the family and not lazy about
π He/she must have regard for your family
π He/she must love the things of God and the gathering of the Saints
π He/she must be a lover of peace
π You must try to discern if he/she has patience as an inate attribute
π you must have at least 70% knowledge of his/her family background and must know what so ever needs to be known on-time
π He/she must not have any form of questionable character
π It is not really necessary for your spouse to be too educated, but it's important that he/she must be intelligent
π You must marry a man/woman whom your heart regards as a friend and he/she must also regard you as a true friend also
With a few of the above present in your proposed spouse, you both will gradually build up a relationship that has love as its sure foundation
Love aligns with God's plan for marriage, after you have found the very one whom you believe you can spend the rest of your life with. Then overtime Love establishes a strong bond between you and your beloved, and in the midst of these all sacrifices are made through the journey of your marriage.
Friends, these words might sound abstract to some readers and too extreme for some others. But, I also know that to some these words won't make any kind of sense to them. It's normal, the True mysteries of the Lord and His kingdom is foolishness to a whole lot of canal people who refuse to seek His wisdom.
I'm not really pleased with the rate at which 'Divorce and Marriage Separations' keep springing up here and there, and making the institution of marriage look ordinary and not potent in the time and season which we all find ourselves.
Marriage is not an institution meant for fibble minds nor for those who are not spiritually mature and alert of God's purpose and plan. Marriage is beyond you 'saying I love you' , it is deeper than that, it has its source from the realms of the spirit and it's original source from GOD Almighty.
Why not join a true Bible believing and practicing Church to learn and be guided to the real essence of MARRIAGE. You can never get the true potential of a device until you take your time to study the manual, same is to marriage.
Marriage can not be totally understood through just reading marital books and gospel books, but you discover a whole lot through Bible teachings and Bible based discussions.
Just know that as I write this post so many marriages are in various types of mess, and a whole lot have crashed because Yahweh was omitted from the equation. Who builds a house without a solid foundation?
We are a few servants of God in this time and season which are tired of seeing marriages crash and turn into a joke for the devil to glory upon. Seek a place of worship, a place where Gods true words are been said and practiced and plant yourself there.
God is pleased with Godly unions and He honors it, you can't just let your peace be hijacked just like that from you, connect today!
I'm Pastor Chidi Ohanum, and I'm glad to be a medium to bring these words to your door step today.
God Bless You!